foolZONE Special Reports for April 1, 2006

Today President Brush signed a bill into law that is quite possibly the first of its kind. In an effort to bring about a lasting peace, it is now a crime punishable by five years in federal prison for anyone to attempt to further "revolutionize the semiconductor industry." Industry insiders welcome this legislation. In fact, since its inception in 1959, the semiconductor industry has been in a constant state of revolution, with players both big and small taking credit for its upheaval. For many, the phrase "revolutionizing the industry" has become so common that the state of constant revolution has come to be considered simply business as usual.

Not everyone is so confident, however. One industry insider is quoted as saying they are only "semi-confident" that this legislation will be effective, but acknowledged that semi-peace is better than no peace at all. The most vocal critics of the law have pointed out the lack of safeguards to deal with the potential for this legislation itself to revolutionize the semiconductor industry, and thereby defeat its own purpose.

Mercenaries who had been providing security services during this period of unrest did not anticipate being out of work for long. Most are already employed, providing the same types of services to the burgeoning and directly competing quasi-insulator industry, which is proving to be just as volatile.

The New Law:

(a) With specific regard to the Semiconductor Industry, whoever travels in interstate or foreign commerce or uses any facility of interstate or foreign commerce, including, but not
limited to, the mail, telegraph, telephone, radio, or television, either by direct, indirect, or non-action with intent -

1. to incite a revolution, a revolt, or otherwise facilitate revolutionization; or
2. to organize, promote, encourage, participate in, or carry on a revolution, a revolt, or otherwise facilitate revolutionization; or
3. to commit any act of violence in furtherance of a revolution, a revolt, or otherwise facilitate revolutionization; or
4. to aid or abet any person in inciting or participating in or carrying on a revolution or committing any act of violence in furtherance of a revolution, a revolt, or otherwise facilitate revolutionization;

and who either during the course of any such travel or use or thereafter performs or attempts to perform any other overt act for any purpose specified in subparagraph (A), (B), (C), or (D) of this paragraph - (FOOTNOTE 1)
(FOOTNOTE 1) So in original. Probably should be ''paragraph
(1), (2), (3), or (4) of this subsection - ''.
Shall be fined under this title, or imprisoned not more than five years, or both.

(b) In any prosecution under this section, proof that a defendant engaged or attempted to engage in one or more of the overt acts described in subparagraph (A), (B), (C), or (D) of paragraph (1) of subsection (a) (FOOTNOTE 2) and (1) has traveled in interstate or foreign commerce, or (2) has use of or used any facility of interstate or foreign commerce, including but not limited to, mail, telegraph, telephone, radio, or television, to communicate with or broadcast to any person or group of persons prior to such overt acts, such travel or use shall be admissible proof to establish that such defendant traveled in or used such facility of interstate or foreign commerce.
(FOOTNOTE 2) So in original. Probably should be ''paragraph (1), (2), (3), or (4) of subsection (a)''.

(c) A judgment of conviction or acquittal on the merits under the laws of any State shall be a bar to any prosecution hereunder for the same act or acts.

(d) Whenever, in the opinion of the Attorney General or of the appropriate officer of the Department of Justice charged by law or under the instructions of the Attorney General with authority to act, any person shall have violated this chapter, the Department shall proceed as speedily as possible with a prosecution of such person hereunder and with any appeal which may lie from any decision adverse to the Government resulting from such prosecution.

(e) Nothing contained in this section shall be construed to make it unlawful for any person to travel in, or use any facility of, interstate or foreign commerce for the purpose of pursuing the
legitimate objectives of organized labor, through orderly and lawful means.

(f) Nothing in this section shall be construed as indicating an intent on the part of Congress to prevent any State, any possession or Commonwealth of the United States, or the District of Columbia, from exercising jurisdiction over any offense over which it would have jurisdiction in the absence of this section; nor shall anything in this section be construed as depriving State and local law enforcement authorities of responsibility for prosecuting acts that may be violations of this section and that are violations of State and local law.

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